A Deeper Meaning
by whyshedisappeared
Summary: "You and Music there's no difference" I don't own any of the songs or the characters
1. The Lucky One

Each chapter is going to have a back story and a song to go with it. This chapter is going to be Maddie, Daphne and Deacon have planned a surprise party for Rayna's 50th birthday party and Maddie is performing a song wrote for her.

 **The Lucky One**

Maddie stepped up to the make shift stage her Daphne and Deacon had put together at the cabin for her mother's birthday. She looked over at her mother who was playing with their little brother, Sam, who had been a big surprise to the Claybourne/Conrad household shortly after her parents got married. As she looked over at them she realized how much this song told the story of her mother's career and how happy she was now that she had taken a backseat to performing, and how much of an understanding Maddie had about the music business now that she had been in it for a couple years. She smiled as she tapped on the microphone getting everyone's attention.

"Hey everybody thanks for coming out today to celebrate my mom's birthday no matter how much she hates it. Instead of getting my mom a present this year, I wrote her a song about her and her life in the spotlight, so mom this is for you" Maddie said as she started strumming her guitar.

 _New to town with a made up name in the angel's city,  
Chasing fortune and fame.  
And the camera flashes, make it look like a dream._

 _You had it figured out since you were in school.  
Everybody loves pretty, everybody loves cool.  
So overnight you look like a sixties' queen.  
Another name goes up in lights, like diamonds in the sky._

 _And they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one.  
Yeah, they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one.  
But can you tell me now, you're the lucky one, oh, oh, oh..._

She remembered the stories her mom would tell her of fighting her grandfather about having a music career while in school and how she had changed her last name to Jaymes when she left the house.

 _Now it's big black cars, and Riviera views,  
And your lover in the foyer doesn't even know you  
And your secrets end up splashed on the news front page_

She thought back to all the privileges her and Daphne had had while their mother was touring. And how after her mother had married Deacon did she realize how much Teddy didn't understand the music business and how much he didn't really know her. Writing the last line of that part of the song had been one of the hardest, since it brought up all the memories of when the news of Deacon being her dad had broke to the media.

 _And they tell you that you're lucky.  
But you're so confused,  
'Cause you don't feel pretty, you just feel used.  
And all the young things line up to take your place.  
Another name goes up in lights. You wonder if you'll make it out alive.  
And they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one.  
Yeah, they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one.  
Can you tell me now, you're the lucky one, oh, oh, oh._

She remembered the downward spiral her mother had gone through when she realized how much Juliette, Layla and Sadie had tried taking her place as the queen of country music.

 _It was a few years later, I showed up here.  
And they still tell the legend of how you disappeared,  
How you took the money and your dignity, and got the hell out.  
They say you bought a bunch of land somewhere,  
Chose the Rose Garden over Madison Square,  
And it took some time, but I understand it now_ _._

As Maddie made her way through the world of country music she began to understand some of the choices her mom had made like when Rayna decided to step back and just do a couple shows at smaller venues rather than sold out stadiums, and how both her mom and dad had talked about selling the house and moving up to the cabin for good like they had talked about all those years ago.

' _Cause now my name is up in lights, but I think you got it right,  
Let me tell you now, you're the lucky one.  
Let me tell you now, you're the lucky one.  
Let me tell you now, you're the lucky one, oh, oh, oh.  
Yeah they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one.  
Yeah, they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one.  
And they'll tell you now, you're the lucky one, oh, oh, oh.  
Oh, whoa, oh, oh_

As Maddie sang the final line she swore she saw tears in both Rayna and Deacon's eyes, that showed not only how proud they were of her but their appreciation of the song.

"I love you mom" Maddie said into the microphone before stepping off the stage and walking toward Rayna.

"Oh Maddie, that was a beautiful song" Rayna said as she wrapped her arms around her giving her a hug.

"Thanks Mom. You really are the lucky one, you've got everything you've ever wanted even with some ups and downs" She said with a smile as she hugged her mom back/


	2. The Moment I Knew

This one is a little more on the depressing side, Rayna writes a song about how Deacon misses her 21st birthday party, Watty had thrown her after they got back from a small tour with George Strait. She performs it a couple days after the party at the bluebird where Deacon ends up hearing it.

 **The Moment I Knew**

Rayna ended up at Tandy's after the party knowing there was no way she could face Deacon after he just hadn't shown up to her party without so much of a phone call saying he wouldn't be there. Rayna tried to be quiet going in to Tandy's house but as it always goes Tandy heard her come in.

"Rayna what are you doing here?" Tandy asked meeting her sister at the door.

"I just couldn't go to Deacon's" Rayna said trying to hide the tears.

Tandy took a deep breath trying to figure out the best way to navigate the conversation. "What happened babe?" Tandy finally ended up saying

"He told me so many times he would show up tonight. That he would be there to celebrate but he never showed up Tandy! How could he do that to me?" Rayna sobbed against her sister

"I'm sorry Rayna but you know how Deacon can be" Tandy said as she rubbed her sisters back trying to comfort her.

"I think I need to break up with him" Rayna said through the tears. Tandy just sighed knowing the cycle these two would get into; break up then get back together then break up again. She knew it was only a matter of time before she went crawling back to Deacon.

"Whatever you think is best honey. Let's get you to bed, you've had a long day" Rayna nodded in response and walked to the guest room at Tandy's. As Rayna laid on the bed she couldn't help but think about the party and how much Deacon had let her down once again, so Rayna decided to do what she did best; write a song.

 **A Couple Days Later**

Deacon was sitting at the bar at the bluebird since he had nothing else to do since Rayna stopped answer any of his calls after the night of her party. He heard the chairs on the stage start to move so he turned to see who was starting off open mic night, he shouldn't have been surprised to see Rayna sitting there on a stool with the small band behind her. He ordered another drink as he knew this was probably gonna be a song about him. He could see from afar just how red and puffy her eyes were from crying and not getting any sleep.

"Hey y'all, how are you tonight?" she greeted the small crowd, and was met with a small round of applause "I'm gonna start off with a song I wrote the other night, I haven't performed it yet so be kind" she said with a small laugh and looked at the man at the piano to start playing.

 _You should've been there,  
Should've burst through the door,  
With that 'baby I'm right here' smile,  
And it would've felt like,  
A million little shining stars had just aligned,  
And I would've been so happy._

 _Christmas lights glisten,  
I've got my eye on the door,  
Just waiting for you to walk in,  
But the time is ticking,  
People ask me how I've been  
As I comb back through my memory,  
How you said you'd be here,  
You said you'd be here._

 _And it was like slow motion,  
Standing there in my party dress,  
In red lipstick,  
With no one to impress,  
And they're all laughing,  
As I'm looking around the room,  
But there's one thing missing,  
And that was the moment I knew._

 _And the hours pass by,  
Now I just wanna be alone,  
But your close friends always seem to know  
When there's something really wrong,  
So they follow me down the hall,  
And there in the bathroom,  
I try not to fall apart,  
And the sinking feeling starts,  
As I say hopelessly,  
"He said he'd be here."_

 _And it was like slow motion,  
Standing there in my party dress,  
In red lipstick,  
With no one to impress,  
And they're all laughing,  
And asking me about you,  
But there was one thing missing,  
And that was the moment I knew._

 _What do you say  
When tears are streaming down your face  
In front of everyone you know?  
And what do you do when the one  
Who means the most to you  
Is the one who didn't show?_

 _You should've been here.  
And I would've been so happy._

 _And it was like slow motion,  
Standing there in my party dress,  
In red lipstick,  
With no one to impress,  
And they're all standing around me singing  
"Happy birthday to you",  
But there was one thing missing,  
And that was the moment I knew._

 _Ooh, I knew.  
Ooh,_

 _You called me later,  
And said, "I'm sorry, I didn't make it,"  
And I said, "I'm sorry too,"  
And that was the moment I knew. _

Deacon tried to make eye contact with her through the whole song but she was looking down the whole time. He couldn't help but notice how haunting her voice sounded due to the sadness he had caused her and the lack of sleep she'd had. AS she got off the stage Deacon quickly got up from his seat at the bar to follow her.

"Rayna! Ray! Rayna stop!" he yelled as he chased after her, he could've sworn she hesitated when he yelled out Ray but she just kept walking.

"Rayna please stop! Baby I'm sorry, please talk to me!" he called as he followed her out the back door of the bluebird.

"What Deacon?!" she yelled as the mascara ran down her face from the tears.

"I'm sorry baby. I didn't mean to miss your party. Vince wanted to go out looking for Vanessa and he started drinking and then roped me in to drinking with him and before I knew it, your party was already over." He said taking her small hand in his bigger hand.

"Deacon, this isn't the first time you've missed something. How am I supposed to know that you're gonna show up at shows when you promise you're gonna show up at my party but don't" She yelled trying to pull away from him.

"Please Ray you gotta believe me. I got you a present and everything, I planned on coming."

"I can't deacon. I need time away for a while. I'm sorry" she said pulling her hand away and walking over to her car. Deacon just watched her walk off and eventually drives away before slamming his fist against the wall of the bluebird.


	3. If You Were My Girl

Time we get to have Deacon show us some of the deeper meanings of his songs. Maddie pressures him into singing a new song while they're at the bluebird together, not knowing Rayna is in the back scouting new talent for Highway 65.

 **If You Were My Girl**

"C'mon dad! They have an open spot, you should totally play the new song you wrote! They'll love it!"

"I don't know Maddie, I wasn't really planning on playing it for anyone" Deacon said while nervously running his hand up and down the back of his neck.

"Everyone knows that you wish mom wasn't marrying Luke so it wouldn't be a big shock that you wrote a song about it" Maddie said trying to convince him. "It's not like Mom's here to hear it anyway, she's off at some Highway 65 thing with Bucky tonight"

"Alright fine, if it'll make you happy, I'll perform it" Deacon gave in and grabbed his guitar before going to the stage.

Rayna was in the back corner talking with Bucky about some of the recent performers when she thought she saw Deacon up on the stage.

"Hey Buck, is that Deacon up there?"

"Yeah, why Rayna?"

"I just didn't know that he was playing tonight, Maddie didn't saying anything about coming here tonight"

"Well Catherine did say there was an empty spot in tonight's line up, maybe they were just here enjoying music. Don't read into it to much Rayna" Bucky said.

"You're right, now what did you think of this one?" Rayna said pointing to one of the pictures on the table.

"What a great night at the Bluebird tonight!" Deacon said while sitting down on one of the stools and adjusting the mic. "So my daughter convinced me to get up on stage tonight and sing this one. I'm not gonna tell y'all what it's about since you'll be able to guess" he said which earned him a couple laughs from the staff that knew his history of writing songs about Rayna. "Anyway this one is called 'If you were my girl'" Deacon said before tuning his guitar.

 _You light up every street light  
You stop every heart when you start that smile  
But somehow you're still lonely  
Oh let me show you why you're the only one I wanna give my heart to  
If you give me the chance, oh I'll show you it's alright  
Oh watch your life_

 _To pick you up, I'd lay you down  
I'd hold you 'til you come unwound  
I'd make you feel like you're all I need  
In this whole world  
Ah, if you were my girl  
If you were my girl_

 _You wouldn't be staring at the ceiling  
With a half broke heart wondering if that feeling is ever  
Going to fade away  
I'd change all that if you let me today  
Cause I've never wanted anything  
The way I want you next to me  
For all my life  
Come on let's ride_

 _I'll pick you up, I'll lay you down  
I'd hold you 'til you come unwound  
I'd make you feel like you're all I need  
In this whole world  
Ah, if you were my girl  
If you were my girl_

 _For the first time maybe ever, who am I kidding  
Girl I've never felt the way I feel, oh it's so real_

 _Let me pick you up, and lay you down  
Hold you 'til you come unwound  
I'll make you feel like you're all I need  
In this whole world  
If you were my girl_

 _If you were my girl  
If you were, if you were my girl  
If you were my girl  
Oh if you were, if you were my girl  
If you were, if you were my girl_

Rayna tried to concentrate on what Bucky was saying but all she could hear was Deacon's voice telling her all the things he would do to her if she was his.

"I'm sorry Buck but I can't do this right now. Not when Deacon's clearly singing about me being with Luke" Rayna said trying to hide the tears forming.

"We can take a break, go get a drink. I've got some calls to make anyway" Bucky said placing a comforting hand on Rayna's hand.

"Thanks" she said with a weak smile as she got up from the booth and walked towards the bar needing a much needed drink.

As Deacon was getting off the stage he saw the familiar red hair of the woman he loved so much. He took a deep breath knowing she had probably heard the song. He gave Maddie a look that said he'd be right back as he headed to the bar. Rayna was ordering a shot of tequila when Deacon got up to the bar.

"Tequila, you were never a big tequila drinker" He said as he stood next to her. She took the shot, not answering him right away.

"It numbs the pain. I drank it a lot, you just never knew" she said not making eye contact instead signaling to the bartender to get her another one.

"Ray look…" Deacon started but was soon cut off.

"Why Deacon? Why here? Why with our daughter here? Is it because I'm here tonight?!" Rayna asked rattling off every question she could think of.

"Maddie knew that you were off at some Highway 65 thing but she didn't know you were here and either did I and I played it because Maddie wanted me to perform something tonight."

"I'm happy with Luke, Deacon" Rayna said finally looking at him for the first time.

"Are you really Ray? Maddie texted me the other night saying she heard you crying and didn't know what to do." Rayna bit her lip trying to form a reply.

"I'm miserable, he wants to send the girls to Europe for boarding school and wants to pretend that we're one happy family but we're not. The girl's are lashing out" Rayna said letting the tears finally fall.

"Ray, ive said it before and I'm gonna say it again. It's Maddie, Daphne, you and me" he said before kissing her"

Maddie had been sitting by herself for a while when she saw Bucky come up to her.

"So is everything going to plan?" Maddie asked as she saw him.

"I would say so" he said motioning to them lip locked at the bar

"Do you think she'll leave Luke?" Maddie asked hopeful.

"If Deacon played his cards right like I think he did, she will" He said with a smile as he watched Rayna pull away with a smile on her face.

"Deacon, I'm sorry for choosing Luke. I shouldn't have even took the time to think who I was gonna choose. All my life it's been you. I guess I was just scared that we'd end up in the cycle we always end up in and I couldn't do that again. Not to myself, not to you and certainly not to my girls."

"Ray, I don't need an explanation but a certain cowboy is gonna need an explanation and that rock you got on your hand has to go before I kiss you again" he said with a smirk. She took the ring off and put it in her pocket before kissing him again. Not caring about the people including their daughter and her manager taking pictures that would soon end up on the internet for a certain cowboy and his manager to find and deal with.


	4. Heartbeat

So this chapter has Rayna premiering a song at the CMA's for Deacon during one of their weekends up at the cabin.

 **Heartbeat**

"I'm honored to present our next performer. She's been teasing on social media about releasing a new song tonight, so please put your hands together for the reigning queen of country music, Rayna Jaymes!" Kelsea Ballerini said as the curtain rose up and the opening beats of Rayna's new song started to flow through the speakers of the Bridgestone Arena.

 _I love it when we're at a party in a down-town crowd  
But I can hear you call me, baby, with the music up loud  
Red wine, good times, no I don't mind being with everyone else  
And then there's nights like tonight that I, I want you to myself  
And tonight I wanna drive so far we'll only find static on the radio  
And we can't see those city lights and I love the way you look in a firefly glow  
Saying everything without making a sound, a cricket choir in the background, underneath a harvest moon  
Standing on your shoes in my bare feet, dancing to the rhythm of your heartbeat  
Oh whoa, and we're dancing to the rhythm of your heartbeat  
_Rayna had gotten the idea for the song on the way up to the cabin after they left the Beverly, which had been crowded with people and all she had wanted to do was be alone with Deacon after the long week both of them had had dealing with Maddie coming back home and trying to get the normalcy back into their family.

 _And I wanna feel it like a kick drum, beating faster in your chest  
I wanna feel you holding onto me and make me hold my breath  
You pull me closer, my head on your shoulder, baby, we won't need a song  
We'll make a fallen star wish, one more slow kiss, what are we waiting on?_

She remembered the weekend they had come up here for their honeymoon before taking a trip to Mexico. Deacon had practically dragged her out of the house and down towards the lake to watch the shooting stars.

 _And tonight I wanna drive so far we'll only find static on the radio  
And we can't see those city lights and I love the way you look in a firefly glow  
Saying everything without making a sound, a cricket choir in the background, underneath a harvest moon  
Standing on your shoes in my bare feet, dancing to the rhythm of your heartbeat  
Yeah we're dancing to the rhythm of your heartbeat  
I wanna feel it like a kick drum, beating faster in your chest_

She remembered how he had started slowly dancing to the sounds of the crickets and the sounds of the breeze rattling the leaves that were coming back to life on the trees. She had thought he was crazy at first but realized it was just one of the million things she loved about him and wouldn't change where she was dancing underneath the stars to the sound of his heartbeat and the crickets.

 _And tonight I wanna drive so far we'll only find static on the radio  
And we can't see those city lights and I love the way you look in a firefly glow  
Saying everything without making a sound  
With a river rolling in the background underneath the harvest moon_  
 _Standing on your shoes in my bare feet, dancing to the rhythm of your heartbeat  
And we're dancing to the rhythm of your heartbeat_

Rayna had taken a bow and blew a kiss before the camera panned off her and onto Luke who was presenting the next award. As she made her way back to her seat she was met backstage by Deacon.

"Ray that was amazing like always" he said taking her in her arms and giving her a quick kiss making sure not to mess up her make up.

"Well it was inspired by you and our mini honeymoon up to the cabin. I could dance to your heartbeat more often than just every once in a while up at the cabin" she said looking up at him.

"Anytime baby. Just tell me when and where"


End file.
